If thereâs one place on the internet where jokes never die, itâs Reddit! đ± From clever one-liners to laugh-out-loud stories, Reddit users know how to deliver the perfect punchline. Whether itâs a dad joke, a witty pun, or a meme-worthy roast, these Reddit jokes are the best of the bestâstraight from the threads that had millions laughing. So sit back, scroll through, and get ready for Reddit jokes that prove the internetâs funniest punchlines are just a comment away!
đŽ Reddit Jokes One Liners
I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes⊠she hugged me.
I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
Parallel lines have so much in common⊠itâs a shame theyâll never meet.
Iâm reading a book about anti-gravityâitâs impossible to put down.
I told my computer I needed a break⊠now it wonât stop sending me Kit-Kats.
I donât trust stairsâtheyâre always up to something.
My math teacher called me averageâhow mean!
I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I donât know y.
Why donât skeletons fight each other? They donât have the guts.
My boss told me to have a good day⊠so I went home.
đ· Reddit Jokes For Adults
Why donât scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everythingâincluding my excuses.
Marriage is like a workshop: the husband works, the wife shops.
Alcohol may not solve your problems⊠but neither will water.
Why do men find it hard to make eye contact? Breasts donât have eyes.
Behind every angry woman stands a man⊠who has absolutely no idea what he did wrong.
Why donât graveyards ever get overcrowded? Because people are dying to get in.
A bartender broke up with his girlfriend⊠but she kept his spirits up.
Why was the belt arrested? It held up a pair of pants.
Relationships are like Wi-Fi: strong when close, weak when far.
Why do women live longer? Because men do all the dangerous âhold my beerâ stuff.
đ Reddit Jokes â Newest Submissions
I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes⊠She gave me a hug.
Why donât graveyards ever get overcrowded? Because people are dying to get in.
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
I used to be addicted to the hokey pokey⊠But I turned myself around.
Why donât skeletons fight each other? They donât have the guts.
Why did the bicycle collapse? It was two-tired.
I asked my dog whatâs two minus two⊠He said nothing.
Why donât eggs tell jokes? Theyâd crack each other up.
Iâm reading a book about anti-gravity⊠Itâs impossible to put down.
Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems.
đ Funny Jokes
Why canât your nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
Why donât eggs tell jokes? Theyâd crack each other up.
What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
Why was the math book sad? Too many problems.
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
Whatâs orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
Why canât your hand be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
Whatâs brown and sticky? A stick.
Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field.
Why donât cows have money? Because farmers milk them dry.
đž Funny Jokes For Adults
Why donât oysters donate to charity? Because theyâre shellfish.
Why donât men write love letters? They text âu up?â instead.
Why do husbands die before their wives? Because they want to.
Why is marriage like a deck of cards? At first, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. Later, you just wish for a club and a spade.
A man walked into a bar⊠ouch.
Why donât graveyards need fences? Because everyoneâs dying to get in.
My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo⊠so I had to put my foot down.
Why do women never tell jokes at football games? Because they donât want to interrupt the play.
Why do men find it hard to open up? The last time they did, they lost half their stuff.
Marriage is just texting each other âDo we need anything from the store?â until one of you dies.
đš Dad Jokes
I used to be addicted to the hokey pokey⊠but I turned myself around.
Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
What do you call cheese that isnât yours? Nacho cheese.
Why canât you trust stairs? Theyâre always up to something.
I donât trust those trees⊠they seem kind of shady.
Why did the scarecrow get promoted? Because he was outstanding in his field.
I only know 25 letters of the alphabetâI donât know y.
Why donât skeletons fight? They donât have the guts.
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
I donât play soccer because I enjoy the sport⊠I just do it for kicks.
đŻ Reddit Jokes That Always Get A Laugh
Why donât scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had the drumsticks.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high⊠she looked surprised.
Why canât you give Elsa a balloon? Because sheâll let it go.
Why did the computer go to the doctor? It caught a virus.
Why donât some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships donât work out.
Why was the stadium so hot? All the fans left.
I told my boss three companies were after me, so I need a raise⊠truth is, it was the gas, electric, and water company.
Why donât seagulls fly over the bay? Because then theyâd be bagels.
Parallel lines have so much in common⊠too bad theyâll never meet.
đ€Ł Seriously Funny Jokes
Why donât skeletons ever fight? They donât have the guts.
I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes⊠she hugged me.
Why donât some fish play piano? Because you canât tuna fish.
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
I used to hate facial hair⊠but then it grew on me.
Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field.
My boss told me to start every presentation with a joke⊠so I used my paycheck.
Why donât sharks eat clowns? They taste funny.
I only get sick on weekdays⊠I must have a weekend immune system.
What do you call a pile of cats? A meow-tain.
đ Classic Reddit One-Liners
I told my computer I needed a break, and now it wonât stop sending me Kit-Kats.
I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.
Why did the scarecrow get promoted? He was outstanding in his field.
Parallel lines have so much in common⊠itâs a shame theyâll never meet.
Why donât oysters donate to charity? Because theyâre shellfish.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Want to hear a construction joke? Sorry, Iâm still working on it.
I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I donât know y.
Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut? He needed some space.
I asked my dog whatâs two minus two. He said nothing.
đ¶ Animal Jokes From Reddit
Why donât seagulls fly over the bay? Because then theyâd be bagels.
What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.
Why did the cow become an astronaut? To see the moooon.
Why donât cats play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.
Whatâs a dogâs favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why was the sheep so embarrassed? It lost its baaa-lance.
Why do crabs never share? Because theyâre a little shellfish.
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
Why was the horse always neigh-boring? It loved company.
Whatâs orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
đ» Tech & Geek Reddit Jokes
Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open.
I changed my password to âincorrect,â so whenever I forget, it tells me.
Why donât programmers like nature? Too many bugs.
Why was the smartphone acting so smart? It had a lot of apps-titude.
Did you hear about the new band called â1023MBâ? They havenât got a gig yet.
Why donât robots panic? Theyâre wired to stay calm.
I told my laptop a joke. It cracked up.
Why was the keyboard tired? It was out of shift.
Why do Java developers wear glasses? Because they canât C#.
Wi-Fi went down for five minutes, so I had to talk to my family. They seem like nice people.
đ Food Jokes Worthy of Upvotes
Why donât eggs tell jokes? Theyâd crack up.
Why did the grape stop in the middle of the road? It ran out of juice.
Whatâs a skeletonâs least favorite room? The living room.
Why was the bread always calm? It knew how to roll with it.
Why donât bananas ever get lonely? They hang out in bunches.
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It felt crumby.
What do you call cheese that isnât yours? Nacho cheese.
Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the salad dressing.
Why donât pancakes argue? They always flip out.
Whatâs a pizzaâs favorite joke style? Cheesy ones.
đ« School & Learning Jokes
Why was the math book sad? Too many problems.
Why canât you trust atoms? They make up everything.
Why was the pencil feeling dull? It wasnât sharp enough.
Whatâs the smartest insect? A spelling bee.
Why was the history teacher always calm? Because it was all in the past.
Why did the music teacher go to the principal? She found herself in treble.
Why was the geometry teacher suspicious? Something didnât square up.
Why did the student eat his homework? Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake.
Why donât tests ever get lonely? They have plenty of questions.
What did the calculator say to the student? You can count on me.
đ Travel & Road Jokes
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time.
Why donât cars ever get tired? Because theyâre always exhausted.
Why do cows hate long road trips? They get mooo-tion sick.
Why did the taxi driver quit? He was just taking people for a ride.
Whatâs a trainâs favorite kind of music? Track music.
Why was the bus always so cheerful? It was driven to succeed.
Why donât planes tell jokes? They might go over peopleâs heads.
Whatâs a traffic lightâs favorite hobby? Stopping and going.
Why was the GPS always positive? It never lost its direction.
đš Dad-Approved Reddit Humor
I only know jokes about construction, but Iâm still working on them.
I used to play piano by ear, now I use my hands.
Iâm reading a book about anti-gravity. Itâs impossible to put down.
Why donât eggs ever argue? They canât handle the pressure.
My dad told me to stop impersonating flamingos. I had to put my foot down.
Iâm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.
Why donât skeletons fight each other? They donât have the guts.
I once told a chemistry joke. There was no reaction.
Why did the stadium get hot? All the fans left.
Want to hear a joke about pizza? Never mind, itâs too cheesy.
đŹ Movie & TV Jokes
Why donât movie stars ever get locked out? They always have the right key.
Why was the film so smart? It had great reels.
Whatâs a zombieâs favorite TV show? The Walking Fed.
Why did the director sit on the ladder? To make high-level films.
Why donât villains ever sleep? Theyâre always plotting.
Whatâs a ghostâs favorite movie genre? Boo-vies.
Why was the screenwriter stressed? Too many plot holes.
Why was the popcorn always happy? It lived a popping life.
Whatâs an actorâs favorite type of rice? Screen-rice.
Why donât superheroes use elevators? They take things to the next level.
đ¶ Music & Band Jokes
Why did the guitarist get detention? He was stringing everyone along.
Whatâs a drummerâs favorite snack? Drumsticks.
Why did the music note go to school? To become sharp.
Why was the choir so cold? Too many altos.
Why was the singer locked out? She forgot her key.
Why was the orchestra always calm? Because it had good conductors.
Whatâs a catâs favorite instrument? The purr-cussion.
Why donât DJs ever get lost? They always find the right track.
Whatâs a pianoâs least favorite thing? Being played off-key.
Why was the band teacher happy? Her class rocked.
đïž Fitness & Gym Jokes
Why donât weightlifters ever argue? They just let things slide.
Why was the treadmill always so positive? It kept moving forward.
Whatâs a runnerâs favorite kind of music? Fast tracks.
Why was the dumbbell so shy? It felt out of shape.
Why donât bodybuilders ever get cold? Theyâve got plenty of muscle.
Why was the jump rope excited? It skipped breakfast.
Whatâs a yoga instructorâs favorite drink? Inner-peas tea.
Why was the exercise bike tired? It was going nowhere.
Why did the barbell go to school? To get stronger.
Why was the trainer always calm? He knew how to keep his cool.
đ Nature & Outdoors Jokes
Why donât trees ever use computers? Theyâre afraid of logging in.
Why was the mountain so funny? It cracked everyone up.
Whatâs a rockâs favorite genre of music? Hard rock.
Why did the flower always look so fresh? It had good roots.
Why donât rivers ever get lost? They follow their course.
Why was the cloud so lazy? It kept drifting.
Why was the bee such a good student? It always buzzed with knowledge.
Why was the leaf always calm? It went with the flow.
Why was the volcano so popular? It was the hottest thing around.
Why donât plants ever fight? They just grow with it.
đïž Shopping Jokes
Why did the shopper bring a ladder? To reach high prices.
Why donât clothes tell jokes? They might get wrinkled.
Why was the wallet always calm? It kept its change.
Why was the shoe so smart? It had great sole.
Why did the store close early? It ran out of stock.
Why was the receipt so long? It had a lot to say.
Why was the shopping cart always tired? Too many errands.
Why was the sale so funny? It was a huge markdown.
Why did the bag break? It couldnât handle the load.
Why was the cashier always smiling? She made cents of everything.
đ Home & Family Jokes
Why was the broom late? It swept in.
Why donât lamps ever get tired? Theyâre always light.
Why was the sofa always calm? It knew how to relax.
Why was the refrigerator so cool? It kept its chill.
Why did the door always tell the truth? It was open and shut.
Why donât clocks ever get lost? They always keep time.
Why was the bed always tired? Too many dreams.
Why was the mirror so honest? It reflected everything.
Why was the curtain always dramatic? It loved making an entrance.
Why donât stairs ever fight? They take things step by step.
đŸ Pet Jokes Reddit Loves
Why was the dog always on time? It was paws-itively punctual.
Why did the cat sit on the computer? To keep an eye on the mouse.
Why was the hamster so fast? It wheel-y liked running.
Why did the bird always sing? It had tweet dreams.
Why was the rabbit so good at math? It multiplied fast.
Why donât fish ever play basketball? Theyâre afraid of the net.
Why was the turtle so calm? It carried its home with it.
Why was the parrot so talkative? It loved spreading wordplay.
Why was the goldfish so stylish? It had good scales.
Why was the lizard so happy? It lived life on the bright side.
đ Internet & Meme Jokes
Why was the meme always late? It was still loading.
Why was the website feeling down? It lost its domain.
Why did the GIF go viral? It looped everyone in.
Why was the YouTube video nervous? Too many views.
Why donât hashtags ever get lonely? Theyâre always trending.
Why was the emoji so popular? It expressed everything.
Why did the Reddit post get famous? It had great karma.
Why was the tweet always happy? It had lots of followers.
Why was the blog so inspiring? It had good posts.
Why was the forum always peaceful? Everyone stayed on topic.
đŒ Work & Office Jokes
Why was the stapler so calm? It kept everything together.
Why donât pens ever get tired? They always make their point.
Why was the paper always so serious? It had too many issues.
Why was the file always organized? It kept things in order.
Why did the keyboard break up with the mouse? It lost connection.
Why was the printer always jammed? It couldnât handle the pressure.
Why did the boss always smile? He had great staff.
Why was the desk so clean? It was well-surfaced.
Why donât meetings ever tell jokes? Theyâd go on too long.
Why was the coffee always late? It got mugged.
đ Party & Celebration Jokes
Why was the cake so happy? It was in tiers.
Why donât balloons argue? They just let things go.
Why was the music always fun? It set the tone.
Why was the confetti so excited? It popped up everywhere.
Why was the candle always positive? It kept shining bright.
Why donât clowns ever get bored? Theyâre full of tricks.
Why was the party so loud? It had too many beats.
Why was the gift so funny? It was a present surprise.
Why was the piñata always nervous? It was full of candy.
Why donât parties ever fail? They always have a blast.
đ Space Jokes Reddit Loves
Why donât astronauts ever get hungry? They always have launch.
Why was the sun always so bright? It had a shining personality.
Why donât stars ever fight? They just twinkle.
Why was the moon always calm? It kept its phases.
Why did the alien go to school? To improve its space-cial skills.
Why donât planets argue? They stay in orbit.
Why was the rocket so fast? It was fueled by laughter.
Why donât comets ever stop? Theyâre on a tail mission.
Why was the satellite always up-to-date? It had good reception.
Why was the astronaut calm? He had stellar patience.
✠Sports Jokes With a Reddit Twist
Why was the baseball always nervous? It didnât want to get hit.
Why was the football team so funny? They had a great punter.
Why donât basketball players ever get lost? They always dribble back.
Why was the tennis match noisy? Too many rackets.
Why did the golfer bring two pants? In case he got a hole in one.
Why was the referee always calm? He had good judgment.
Why did the runner always carry paper? In case he had to jog down notes.
Why was the hockey game cold? It was on ice.
Why donât swimmers ever get tired? They just keep floating.
Why was the soccer player so good at jokes? He had great kick lines.
đ€ Sleep & Relaxation Jokes
Why donât naps ever argue? Theyâre always restful.
Why was the blanket always happy? It covered everything.
Why was the pillow so supportive? It had soft advice.
Why donât dreams ever lie? They tell you whatâs inside.
Why was the bed always tired? It worked nights.
Why did the alarm clock break up with the sleeper? Too many snooze buttons.
Why was the nap so short? It wanted to keep it brief.
Why donât pajamas argue? Theyâre too cozy.
Why was the hammock always relaxing? It had good sway.
Why was the rest day so fun? It was well-deserved.
 FAQs?
Q: Why are Reddit jokes so funny?
A: Because the punchlines are short, clever, and scroll-friendly.
Q: Can I use Reddit jokes at parties?
A: Absolutely! Theyâre quick crowd-pleasers.
Q: Whatâs the difference between a dad joke and a Reddit joke?
A: Not muchâboth get groans and laughs!
Q: Do Reddit jokes make good captions?
A: Yes, theyâre perfect for witty Instagram or Twitter posts.
Q: Are Reddit jokes safe for kids?
A: Most of them, yesâespecially the puns and one-liners.
Q: What subreddit is best for jokes?
A: r/Jokes, r/dadjokes, and r/cleanjokes are fan favorites.
Q: Can I tell Reddit jokes at work?
A: Sure, just stick to the clean and office-friendly ones.
Q: Do Reddit jokes age well?
A: The classics always stay funny.
Q: What makes a Reddit jokes get upvoted?
A: Relatable humor, quick delivery, and a clever twist.
Q: Where can I find more pun collections?
A: Explore more laughs at PunsPlanet.com!
Conclusion
And there you have it Reddit jokes that prove the internetâs favorite community knows how to deliver laughs. Whether youâre scrolling at 2 AM, looking for a quick icebreaker, or just need a chuckle, these puns and one-liners are guaranteed to lighten the mood. If one made you smile, share it with your friendsâor better yet, leave a comment with your favorite! Want even more pun-packed fun? Head over to PunsPlanet.com for endless laughs.