200+ Language Arts Jokes That Will Have Grammar Geeks and Word Lovers Laughing

 Vocabulary Vibes

• My vocabulary’s growing — it’s quite articulate.

• Big words make me loquacious.

• I have a word for you — “dictionary.”

• Words fail me… but not often.

• My thesaurus is lost for words.

• Verbally speaking, I’m fluent.

• Words are my currency.

• My lexicon is lit.

• Every word counts — literally.

• I’m in a committed relationship with adjectives.

 Writing Winks

• I write because punching people is frowned upon.

• My pen is my therapist.

• Editing is just fixing yesterday’s mistakes.

• I write wrongs.

• First drafts are practice lies.

• My keyboard is my canvas.

• Typing is my cardio.

• Writing is 10% inspiration, 90% perspiration.

• Plot holes are my specialty.

• I’m booked… with deadlines.

Editing Escapades

• Editors always make corrections — even in texts.

• I cut words like a ninja.

• Editing is just a fancy word for nitpicking.

• Red pens are weapons.

• My edits speak louder than my drafts.

• Grammar police? More like grammar SWAT.

• Perfection is an edit away.

• Delete key is my best friend.

• I fix typos in my sleep.

• Every edit tells a story.

 Essay Entertainment

• My essay is long enough to be a novel.

• Thesis statements are my opening act.

• Essays are just academic rants.

• Citations make me credible.

• MLA is my middle name.

• Double-spacing is my breathing room.

• Word count is my biggest enemy.

• Essays end… eventually.

• Paragraphs are my building blocks.

• I put the “pro” in procrastination.

 Classroom Chuckles

• Whiteboards are just chalkboards with makeup.

• Teachers speak fluent eye-roll.

• Desks are where dreams nap.

• Homework multiplies overnight.

• Class clowns are unpaid comedians.

• Lunch bell is the sweetest sound.

• Group projects are friendship tests.

• Notes are paper gold.

• Pencils disappear faster than free Wi-Fi.

• School rules? More like school suggestions.

 Idiom Ideas

• Break a leg… but not literally.

• It’s raining cats and dogs — hope they land safely.

• Spill the beans, then clean up the mess.

• Hit the books — gently.

• Let the cat out of the bag — hope it’s friendly.

• A piece of cake… with frosting.

• Don’t cry over spilled milk — drink it instead.

• Under the weather — bring an umbrella.

• Bite the bullet — not tasty.

• Jump on the bandwagon — make room!

 Reading Room Jokes

• My library card is my VIP pass.

• Reading is my escape plan.

• Books are my travel agents.

• Quiet, please — I’m in another world.

• My book club reads between snacks.

• E-readers keep my shelves uncluttered.

• I hoard bookmarks.

• Page-turners are my cardio.

• Bookstores are my happy place.

• The smell of books is my perfume.

 Quote Quirks

• “Quote me on that,” said me.

• Famous last words… aren’t always famous.

• Air quotes make everything suspicious.

• I put quotation marks around my feelings.

• “Sarcasm” is my second language.

• Great quotes are timeless — like me.

• Don’t misquote me, bro.

• Wise words come from coffee.

• My fridge is full of motivational quotes.

• Quoting Shakespeare makes me fancy.

Storytime Snickers

• Once upon a time… I forgot the plot.

• Stories without endings drive me nuts.

• My favorite genre? Short and sweet.

• Plot twists keep me awake.

• Bedtime stories are my lullaby.

• My life is a choose-your-own-adventure.

• Story arcs are my roller coasters.

• Every hero needs snacks.

• Side characters deserve love too.

• Happily ever after… until the sequel.

 Creative Writing Cracks

• My imagination runs marathons.

• Fiction is just lying with flair.

• I talk to my characters.

• Writer’s block is my nemesis.

• Ideas hit at 2 a.m.

• I chase plot bunnies.

• My drafts are endangered species.

• Creativity needs caffeine.

• I’m a plot twist addict.

• My muse is on vacation.

Grammar Giggles

• Why did the comma break up with the apostrophe? Too possessive.

• I’m reading a book on anti-gravity — it’s impossible to put down.

• The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.

• Why did the colon break up? It didn’t want to be taken for granted.

• Spell check and I are no longer on speaking terms.

• Why did the semicolon go to therapy? It had too many pauses.

• I asked the Oxford comma out, but it was noncommittal.

• Don’t use double negatives — they’re a no-no.

• I used to dislike punctuation, but now I’m exclamation-point happy!

• Grammar jokes are capital!

Punctuation Puns

• Periods stop everything.

• Commas save lives — let’s eat, Grandma!

• Quotation marks are “so dramatic.”

• Semicolons wink at you halfway.

• Exclamation points get overly excited!

• Apostrophes show what’s theirs.

• Question marks? Always curious.

• Hyphens connect like matchmakers.

• Ellipses leave you hanging…

• Parentheses (add a little extra).

Spelling Shenanigans

• I before E except after C… weird, right?

• My spell checker loves making me look dum.

• Dyslexics are teople poo.

• I made a typo — it was a character flaw.

• Spelling bees have hives of activity.

• Autocorrect is my worst enema.

• I can’t spell armageddon, but it’s not the end of the world.

• Phonetics is not spelled the way it sounds.

• Misspelled words are a write-off.

• When in doubt, scramble it out.

Literature Laughs

• Why did Shakespeare only write in pen? Pencils confused him — 2B or not 2B.

• Reading while sunbathing makes you well-red.

• I’m reading a book about anti-gravity — can’t put it down.

• The plot thickens like gravy.

• Libraries are booked solid.

• Poe’s raven is nevermore available for comments.

• Novelists always have the last word.

• Bookmarks are for quitters.

• My life’s an open book — unfortunately, it’s a dictionary.

• Cover to cover, I’m hooked.

Teacher Humor

• I told my class a joke about grammar — they groaned in perfect tense.

• Teachers mark the spot.

• English teachers have a lot of character.

• Reading assignments are novel ideas.

• Teachers are good in principle.

• I’ve got class, literally.

• Homework? More like home-quack.

• Mark my words — literally.

• My teacher’s favorite drink? Proper tea (property).

• In English class, mistakes are write of passage.

Wordplay Wonders

• Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

• I used to be a banker but lost interest.

• I’m on a seafood diet — I see food and eat it.

• Broken pencils are pointless.

• I’m reading about glue — it’s binding.

• Bakers make lots of dough.

• I told a joke about construction — I’m still working on it.

• A bicycle can’t stand alone — it’s two-tired.

• Electricians have to be grounded.

• Photographers focus on the big picture.

Synonym Smiles

• Synonyms are just words with friends.

• Big and large are in a huge relationship.

• Tiny and small are close-knit.

• Sick and ill share symptoms.

• Rapid and quick are speedy pals.

• Happy and joyful are cheerful together.

• Angry and mad blow up together.

• Smart and clever are brainy buddies.

• Pretty and beautiful are stunning.

• Old and ancient have history.

Reading Riddles

• Why did the book join the police? It wanted to go undercover.

• I told my bookshelf a joke — it cracked up.

• Bookworms are well-read.

• Reading in bed is my novel idea.

• Libraries have great circulation.

• My book club can’t stop talking — it’s all in good binding.

• E-books are all about the download life.

• The author had a plot twist in life.

• I read between the lines.

• I have shelf control issues.

Poetry Puns

• Haikus are easy,
  But sometimes they don’t make sense,
  Refrigerator.

• Sonnets are verse good.

• Iamb what I am.

• Rhymes are in time.

• Free verse is priceless.

• Couplets are better in pairs.

• Epic poems are a long story.

• Poems with feet walk the page.

• Meter readers have rhythm.

• Poetry in motion — or just moving words.

Homophone Humor

• Eye sea what you did there.

• Their, they’re, there — all in the same boat.

• Flour power in baking.

• I knead dough to live.

• The knight rode at night.

• Write it right.

• Won one prize.

• Tail tells a tale.

• Sun and son shine bright.

• Meat to meet you.